no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
