I think scott just propositioned me for sex
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
You took a bar mat shot.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
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