stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
