Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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