I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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