love makes seman taste better
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Randomize
