So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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