I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
