I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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