She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Randomize
