I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I want a musical about memes.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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