sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
