At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
