I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
