i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
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