I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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