So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
