But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
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