Rock
Scissors
Fuck
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
