Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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