she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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