that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
