you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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