I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
