I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
