oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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