Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
