why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
My vagina just recognized that song.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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