if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
