this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
The air taste purple.
Randomize
