His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
