how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
