theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
