can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Come share oat with me in your robe
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
