My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
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