Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
