Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
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