Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
