i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
you made out with another girl for some wings
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
