im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
