Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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