just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Let the clothes fall where they may.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
