we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Randomize
