Can Purell be used as lube?
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
