BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
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