i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
