so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
