nut hugger
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
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