are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Screwed.edu
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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