yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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